Making the Most of College
Focus on your studies. Focus on the reason why you came to college: getting a degree. Spend extra time going to tutoring, office hours, and review sessions. Use all of the academic resources you have, such as the library and the writing center. Make sure you understand what’s going on in all of your classes and are getting the most out of the classes you’re taking. If you’re struggling in a class, ask your TA or professor what kinds of resources you can use. Make sure to do all of the reading for your classes! Even if it seems like a lot, it will pay off in the end. When you get an assessment back, be sure to look not just at the grade but also at the comments written on it and the specific places where you made mistakes.
Join student groups. A great way to meet people, build on your skills, and do something for a cause you love is to join a student group. Whether you want to do intramural soccer or write for a literary magazine, student groups can be really fun and rewarding. Many of them let in everyone who wants to join, but they also have leadership positions available for people who show commitment and responsibility. Here are some kinds of student groups you can look into joining: Political groups Club or intramural sports teams Women’s groups LGTBQIA+ groups Community service groups Fraternities and sororities
Build up your resume. College is a great time to build up your resume so that you’re prepared when it’s time to look for a job. In particular, building different experiences will strengthen your resume. Here are some activities you can do at college that will strengthen your resume: Leadership of any sort Sports teams Student groups Student government Volunteer activities Part-time jobs Research assistant jobs Entrepreneurial endeavors
Feel free to date casually. College is a great time to meet a lot of new, interesting people. Just because you don't want to commit yourself to a relationship doesn't mean that you should stop yourself from dating entirely. You can meet potential dates at parties, dances, in classes, or at the campus coffee shop. Whether you ask someone out or they ask you out, feel free to date casually. However, you should be clear from the beginning that you don't want a relationship. You can say something like, "I've been having a great time with you, but I'm really not looking for a relationship right now." You could also say, "I'm happy to go on a date with you, but I just want to be honest about the fact that I am not interested in a relationship." Fun places for casual dates include coffee dates, lunch dates, mini golf, and parties or dances. Someone you're casually dating can also hang out with you and your friends. No matter what, though, be clear that you are not looking for a relationship. EXPERT TIP John Keegan John Keegan Dating Coach John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health. John Keegan John Keegan Dating Coach If you're struggling to find a date, check out places that interest you. Head to places that align with your interests, like bookstores or art galleries, to find a natural opportunity to meet like-minded people. Connecting over common interests can lead to engaging new relationships, romantic or otherwise!
Investing More Time in Yourself
Say “yes” more. When you’re not in a relationship, you probably have room in your life to say “yes” to more. Whether it’s a spontaneous trip to a concert on a Friday night, taking a spring break trip, or studying abroad for a semester, being single means that you have the freedom to do anything without worrying about affecting your significant other. Embrace your freedom and take risks on new experiences. If you feel like you haven’t had the opportunity to say “yes” in a while, here are some suggestions: Go away for the weekend. Find a concert near you and go, no matter what the band is. Grab a friend and find somewhere to sleep outside.
Try new things. College is a great time to try new things, both in an academic and social sense. In college, you have so many opportunities to try new things and have new experiences. Whether it’s taking a class outside your academic field or trying to learn a new sport, you should take the opportunity to try a lot of new things. When you’re single, you have more time to explore. Here are just a few things you could try: Learn a new instrument Take a class you never thought you would take (astronomy, basket weaving, ceramics -- the options are endless!) Try out for a dance or a capella group EXPERT TIP Amy Chan Amy Chan Relationship Coach Amy Chan is a Relationship Coach based in New York, New York. She is the Founder of Renew Breakup Bootcamp, a retreat that takes a scientific and spiritual approach to healing after the end of a relationship. She has over 12 years of experience helping clients work on their relationships with strategies rooted in the psychology and science of relationships and personal development. Her team of psychologists and coaches at Renew Breakup Bootcamp has helped hundreds of individuals, and the Bootcamp has been featured on CNN, Vogue, the New York Times, and Fortune. Her book based on her work, Breakup Bootcamp, was published in 2020 and was featured by the New York Times. Amy Chan Amy Chan Relationship Coach There's a freedom about being single that's very liberating. Amy Chan, relationship expert and founder of Renew Breakup Bootcamp, says: "Being able to reinvent yourself is one of the most exciting things about being single. You have a blank canvas, plus you have the time, energy, and headspace to focus on your relationship with yourself. Because of that, you get to paint the type of life, love, and partnership that you want."
Pursue interests outside of school. Being in a relationship takes up a lot of time. When you’re single, though, you might find yourself with some time to spare. What do you look forward to when your problem sets are done, your friends are busy, and you have some alone time? Think about skills you want to develop or things you’ve always wanted to learn. Now is the time! Here are some suggestions to get you started; you could learn to: Play the piano Identify constellations Rock climb Tutor underserved students
Work out. Exercise is beneficial for your mental, emotional, and physical health. Hit the gym five days a week: twice for cardio, three times for strength training. Don’t forget to incorporate two rest days into your routine. Here are some different ways that you can exercise: Take a spinning class. Rock climb. Lift weights with a friend. Many schools offer weight lifting classes, too. Swim laps. Go for a hike with a friend. Take a “boot camp” style class.
Find a cause you care about. College is a great time to explore potential ways you want to spend your professional career. Many people find one of their passions in college and pursue it after they graduate. Whether you're interested in hedge funds or public service, there are many opportunities you can pursue in college. Here are some ways that you can get involved with potential career paths or causes: Volunteer at an animal shelter Intern at a company near your school Tutor underserved students Volunteer in a community garden Protest a political issue (make sure you are not disrupting the peace or safety of others) Intern with a government official Write for the school newspaper or magazine
Focusing on Other Relationships
Spend time with your friends. Single people more frequently have closer ties with friends, have more friends, and are better friends to others. This phenomenon occurs because single people have more time to spend with their friends. Take advantage of your single lifestyle to hang out with your friends, make new friends, and forge better relationships with friends both new and old. Instead of going to parties with your significant other, you can go with your group of friends. You don’t have to worry about keeping track of your date or making awkward small talk. Designate at least one night a week where you and your friends spend quality time with each other. Whether it’s a movie night or watching a sports game, make time to hang out with your friends.
Call your parents or other family members. Sometimes it’s easy to forget about your parents and other family members when you’re away at college, but they will certainly appreciate it if you give them a call or even send a text. Try to call your parents at least once a week to update them on your life and your studies. Calling family is also a good way to combat the loneliness that a lot of people feel while they are away at college. If you keep forgetting to call your parents, set a regular time when you call them. Set an alarm on your phone, or ask them to call you at that time.
Talk to professors. Professors have office hours where you can go talk to them about the material from the class, but many of them are also happy to talk to you about academics and life and general. You can only forge relationships with professors in college, so you should take advantage of this opportunity. Look at a schedule to see when your professors’ office hours are, or you can email them to ask to meet individually.
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