OK, so everyone's got it. Big shit man.
I got one too. Except that mine is meatier, hotter, wilder, more times a week… yeah stop getting ideas. I am talkin bout this blog! OK?
Lol
Duhty mind.
Anyways if I got this written, am sure someone’s reading it so I thought why should I be an ass like many who pretend nobody’s really reading it and its all written for their oh so private enjoyment.
I know you’re all there snooping and looking for something that is respectable and lets you get away with peeping through the window of mah study, mah bedroom n mah…well lets jus say…mah privacy.
Fine you like to look, so look na... ;)
Who cares? You’ll never find out who I am, so I am cool with telling all about the crazy stuff that happens in my life everyday n night. Jus wont tell you no names…(remember dat scene in ‘Last tango in Paris’ where Marlon Brando is like - ‘don’t tell me your name, I hate names, no names!’)
Like lemme tell you what happened today. Nothing earth shaking but put me off big time. In fact, it’s become a headache now. I was driving down from Noida to watch a movie n I’d taken the toll bridge. When my speed got to about 120, my cell began ringing. N when I took the cal without looking who it was I thought SHIT NOT HIM AGAIN!
It was this weirdo from a small town who I met years back, n when I say years back I mean when I was a kid (16 hehe) n all. Then some one year back I was at a red light in my car one day, and this car comes and stops next to me (this is like very close to where I stay…uh) and he sticks his neck out n says in that really really downmarket way - ‘aap XYZ (wont give you mah name) hain na? ‘Mainey aapko ek din car mein dekha tha. Tubsey mein roz subah aapko dekhney yahan aata hunh. Do you remember me?’
I was like hello! ‘Yeh kaun hai?’ Then when he gave me his name and all, I remembered him. So I just smiled and said hello and namastey etc etc.
But the biggest mistake I made was to give him my number!
MAN! Lemme tell u one thing, if you’re young and you got a face, NEVER EVER give your cell number to these small town romeos! SHIT!
No kidding. The guy jus started to call me almost everyday. So I just stopped taking his calls. Then what he did was that he started to send me these corny messages. Exactly the kind you don’t wanna read when the cell goes beep, like “will u b my friend?” “I want to meet u?”…“Pls at least reply”…
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So once in a while I’d sms him - ‘I am fine but busy’ n that would make him happy n he’d start all over again. Man u jus can’t shake them off. N you should see him. He looks all right from far, ok. Like young and features n ok body types. But come close n he reeks of mufasil style. Gelled hair, new everything from jeans to T-shirt to watch. Why do they do this?
Anyway then on my b’day few months back, I was on my way outta home n driving to meet one of my few serious boyfriends and this romeo again drives close and pulls up his car like he is Hrithik Roshan or something. Then he jumps outta the car n comes to my window grinning wildly (all 32 out) with a big big bunch of red flowers n saying happy b’day.
Now lemme tell you one thing ok, I LOVE MYSELF. I love it when people praise me, when they give me attention, when they’re nice to me. So I said fine yaar. What the eff... I said the thanks n stuff and how nice of you and drove away promising to meet him someday.
After that romeoji kept smsing me n I didn’t. (Once in a while I did actually, telling him he that I am seriously busy with work and jazz)
And now yesterday when I am driving I actually pick up his call n he goes
“Hello. Mujhey pata tha aap utha logi mera phone. Batao kab milna hai.”
So I told him not to call me or message me PLEASE PLEASE. But he kept insisting. Now he says he will also follow me.
Shucks. Uh? What do I do?
Go to the police? And say what?
Weird man. I hope he doesn’t jump me someday. Like when I am driving down alone at night or early in the morning.
Ya man, I mean Delhi’s not safe. The creep. Urgh. I can feel it on my skin.
;)
Gotta rush now. Was I rambling? Eh?
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