A journey of hope

CHENNAI: They say that God couldn’t be everywhere and so he created moms in his stead. Don’t think so? Then, it’s time you met the mothers of certain physically challenged children, who despite being fully fit, have looked to walk the path of pain for their children’s sake. They have sacrificed their well being and gone out of their way to make life better for their kids.Take for instance, the case of Jyothi Ramaraj (46), the mother of Sibi Siddarth, a 22-year-old who has multiple disabilities.  Says Jyothi, “When my son was born, he didn’t give out a birth cry. He had respiratory issues. At that point, we did not know that he would be a child with multiple disabilities. In those initial years, though we took him to a special school, we always believed that he would grow up to be a normal kid. It took a few more years to understand that he was going to be a special child for life.”Radha Mani (40), who is the mother of 16-year-old Tharanika, who has cerebral atrophy, is another person like Jyothi. Radha says, “When doctors said that she could have problems, I always thought it was only going to be for a brief period.”When realisation struck, it was initially mind-numbing for these mothers. Slowly, they came to terms with the situation on hand. Jyothi says, “It was a shock that I took  time to come to terms with. I am his mother, after all. When I started accepting the fact, I decided that together, we had to battle the disability.” Radha says, “When I first took her to the special school, I was horrified to see the other children there. I came back home and cried out of helplessness. My husband then encouraged me to go back to the special school again and gradually I came to terms with her situation.”Radha has come a long way in her journey. Over the years, she has done a B Ed in special education and now works as a special educator with the Spastic Society of Tamil Nadu.Jyothi, who carried her son for the first six years of his life, goes to school (Spastic Society of Tamil Nadu) with him every day. With her exposure, she has practically become a special educator.Jyothi says, “Dealing with a boy with multiple disabilities was not easy. Though I knew he could understand what I was trying to say, he couldn’t communicate back. During the last seven years, after he started his training with the Spastic Society of Tamil Nadu, his communication skills have improved dramatically. I was over whelmed when I came to know that actually my son could understand the things that I was telling him all these years. It was a moment of great joy. Now he uses his laptop. He communicates very well.” Talking about family acceptance, Jyothi says, “It is very important that the immediate family accepts the child, especially if a special child has siblings, bring them up together and do not isolate the special child.”In Sibi’s case, he has a younger brother who treats him normally and as an equal. “My younger son advises me to treat Sibi like an adult and not like a kid,” says Jyothi“Luckily for me, my family was very supportive. Tharanika gets very excited to the point she loses sleep when she has to go to her grandmother’s place,” shares Radha.