Lead with a fun icebreaker.
A goofy question or game eases you into the convo. Rather than jumping into a serious topic right away, start the conversation with something light and fun. You could ask a “would you rather” question or have them choose what they like from a list so you can get to know them better. You’ll seem really upbeat and entertaining to your match and get them really excited to talk to you! “Which vacation sounds better to you: skiing in the mountains ⛷️ relaxing on the beach ????️ or camping at a state park ⛺?” “If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be? ????? ????? Maybe ?????” “Two truths and a lie! I’m an amazing dancer ????, Halloween is my favorite holiday ????, or I’ve never had a cavity ????.”
Mention something from their profile.
You can find a lot of conversation starters from their pics and bio. Your match took the time to write about themselves and post fun pics, so you’ll have no trouble finding something to talk about. Read through their interests for something that intrigues you and bring it up in your first message. Your match will love that you paid attention to the details they left in their profile. “Wow! I think it’s so cool that you surf! ???? How long did it take you to learn how to hang ten?” “No way, my favorite movie is La La Land too! What scene do you like the best?” “If that’s your artwork, it looks gorgeous ???? Where did you learn to paint like that?”
Ask an open-ended question.
Your match will appreciate that you want to learn more about them. Open-ended questions start with words like “what” or “how” so your match has to type out a longer response. If you’re just starting the convo, lead with some simple questions about their interests, hobbies, and their job. After they respond, give your answer to the question to keep the chat alive. “What’s the best book you’ve ever read? ????” “How do you like to spend your free time? “What was the best part of your workday today?” Aziz Ansari Aziz Ansari, Comedian and Modern Dating Guru Starting a conversation on a dating app nowadays calls for blending humor, curiosity and authenticity. Open with a question or observation that demonstrates you read their profile closely. The goal is not merely laughter but sparking a sincere exchange that can foster a more meaningful bond. Every thriving relationship, regardless of duration, begins with a single, captivating conversation. Even digitally, make that initial outreach thoughtful, playful and real.
Play the built-in Bumble Question Game.
Bumble has great suggestions if you have trouble thinking of your own. Just tap on the Question Game button when you’re on the chat to open up the game. Swipe through the questions and send one of them to your match. You’ll only see each other’s answers once you both respond. Questions might be something like, “What’s the most random way you’ve entertained yourself this week?” or “What is something you’re currently obsessed with?”
Talk about things you have in common.
You’ll build an instant connection if you have shared interests. You don’t have to like all of the same things, but it’s a good sign when you can geek out about the things you love together. If you see something that you enjoy in their profile, mention how much you love it too. They’ll be drawn to you immediately because you have similar tastes. “OMG Imagine Dragons is my favorite band too! My favorite song is ‘Radioactive!’ What’s yours?” “I’ll have you know I LOVE to go biking ???? do you have any favorite trails in the area?” “It’s so crazy that we’re both artists ???? We should try to collab on something soon!”
Show off your sense of humor.
Telling a joke lightens the mood and sounds flirty. It doesn’t matter if you’re a comedian—even a cheesy joke will get your match to smile and laugh! You could try out your favorite one-liner or make light of something you saw in their profile as long as you don’t say anything mean or offensive. “I hope you know CPR because you took my breath away! ????” “I hope you don’t mind. I don’t have a library card but I’ve been checking you out ????” “Your cat looks so cute. But not cuter than you ????”
Pay them a compliment.
A little flattery shows your match that you’re really interested. There’s bound to be something impressive or eye-catching on your match’s profile, so don’t be afraid to mention it. You could say something nice about their talents, interest, personality, or how they look in their pics. Just avoid saying anything sexual when you’re starting the chat since it could give off the wrong impression and make them feel uncomfortable. “You have such an inviting smile ????” “The jokes in your profile made me laugh so hard! You’re so funny!” “You’re so easy to talk to ???? I feel like I could tell you anything.”
Keep the chat positive.
Having a fun conversation makes you more attractive. If you only talk about sad or depressing topics, it could turn your match off of the conversation. You both came on Bumble to have a good time and to find someone who makes you feel happy and excited, so chat about the things that you love to do and your passions. Your match will love that you’re always in a good mood and will want to keep the convo going.
Send them a cute pic.
Showing off a selfie will grab their attention. Bumble lets you send pictures directly in the chat, so it’s really easy to share your favorite pictures. Take a pic when you’re feeling good about how you look so your match can get a good look at you. Bonus points for sending a pic of you doing an exciting activity since your match will feel like they’re missing out. Send a caption with your picture. If you share a selfie, you could say, “Just got this outfit! What do you think?” Avoid sending any lewd photos. Bumble will censor them and give your match the option if they want to view them, but it could make them feel uncomfortable.
Leave them an Audio Note.
Your match will love listening to a quick audio message from you. If you want to leave an Audio Note, just hold down the microphone button on the chat and say your message out loud. Once you let go of the button, Bumble will send your message! You could mention something about your day, tell a funny story, or let them know that you’re thinking of them. They’ll be able to listen and replay your message as much as they want. If you don’t like the Audio Note you’re recording, swipe to the left to cancel it.
Ring them up on a Voice Call.
Hearing your match’s voice will be a refreshing change of pace. If you don’t want to give out your phone number yet, you can still use the built-in Voice Call feature on Bumble. All you have to do is tap the phone icon on your chat and it will start a Voice Call. Catch up about your days and say anything you normally would have in your text chat to keep the conversation going. Even if your match missed your call, they’ll get a notification that you tried to ring them and they can reach out to you when they’re free.
Hop on a Video Chat together.
It’ll be nice seeing your match while you chat. Bumble Video Chat is built right into the app and it’s so easy to call each other. Just tap on the Video Chat button at the top of your conversation and it’ll start your call. Your conversation will feel a lot more natural now that you’re chatting face-to-face. Try to dress nicely for your match so you leave a good impression on them.
Explore deeper conversation topics.
Talk about your values and future to see if you’re both on the same page. After you’ve had a few casual conversations, start digging a little deeper into who they are. Just ask them about what’s most important in their life, what goals they have, what they want to do for a career, or what they expect in their future. Be sure to open up about yourself too so your match can see if you’re right for them. “What do you hope to be doing 5 years down the road?” “What are some traits you value most in a relationship?” “What’s the biggest goal you’re trying to achieve right now?”
Try transitioning off the app.
Taking your convo off-app shows that you’re really interested. If they’re actively messaging you and asking questions, it’s a good sign that they want to get to know you more. After a few days of chatting and opening up to one another, test the waters and give your match your phone number and ask them to text you. They’ll gladly make the switch over if they feel a connection with you. “It’s been amazing chatting with you. Here’s my number if you want to text me ????” “Bumble’s been fun, but here are my digits ☎️ give me a call sometime ????” “I really love what we have here. Do you want to switch to texting instead of Bumble?”
Suggest getting together in person.
Test out your physical chemistry to see if you’re a good match. After you’ve opened up and feel comfortable chatting with your match, don’t be afraid to take them out on a date within the week. Ask your match if they’re interested in going out. Give a couple of date options in public places, like getting a coffee at a cafe, attending a festival, or going for a walk in the park, so they can choose what they want to do. “It’s been so much fun getting to know you ???? do you want to meet up and grab a coffee this Friday?” “I’m really feeling a connection here. Would you be down to get some drinks tonight? ????” “Are you free any night to get together next week? I know an amazing Italian place where we could have dinner!”
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